I even went for a walk in the rain to try and get the tesnion out of my system but it hasn't helped at all. I guess I shouldn't also be reading various news stories about the environment and politics today as they are generally not helping my feelings too much.
I just generally feel down and, yes, I know I have many people who are more than willing to talk to me and give me comfort. But sorry folks, this is not what is needed at present. It's appreciated though so thanks.
In some ways I wish I could just take a few weeks/months off and disappear to refind myself and flush my system of feeling shit (or maybe of feelings in general). I really do need a good holiday - or atleast some time away in a stressfree world where I don't have to worry about things or have people nagging me. I don't like being needy but I am needy.
There are certain people I need in my life. I need very badly to be with. Who are good for me and make me feel better. Who take away the worries for no apparent reason apart from being themselves and giving me a hug.
People like these are very rare. People like these keep me here.
I love them and they know it.
So why do I still hurt for no bloody reason?