Happy New Year folks and best wishes to every single one of you for 2005. I hope it's an ace year for you all and one to remember for all of the right reasons.
I'll post more later I'm sure but for now I need to put my boots on and head over to my mothers for a lovely roast beef and Yorkshire pudding lunch.
And I *really* *really* need some good food in me at the moment. After last night my meagre bowl of Special K hasn't helped fill the spot this morning.
Take care folks and dream carefully
I've never been one for New Years Resolutions but I do have a few aims I'd like to achieve in 2005.
Among them are:
1. Start seeing published material from Cubicle 7.
2. Actually manage to do some proper writing both for Cubicle 7 products and maybe a few short stories/new poems.
3. Find 'True Love' and live 'Happily Ever After'
4. Pass my driving test.
5. See more of close friends.
I had a shit year in 2004 on the whole. It certainly had some brighter moments and Sarah (whatever faults we may or may not have had) did help bring a fair amount of light to it. I'd go as far as saying that she was the best thing that happened to me in 2004. I really do hope that I meet someone and we both fall head-over-heels in love and 'last' but that's the one aim of the above 5 that I think is the least likely to happen. I'm generally very picky and also very shy when it comes to meeting new people socially (I know many of you would disagree with that last bit but believe it or not it is sadly very, very true) and my tastes in women are even harder.
It gets harder to meet people as you get older and, as much as I hate to say it, the scenes in which I move in are surprisingly not really the scenes that have the type of women I fancy. Sure I've been out with a few goth women over the last 16 years but the last was over ten years ago. My tastes in women do not match my social circles so this is obviously a vast hinderance. Saying that though there are certainly some 'cuties' in the scene - I just hope they don't end up being completely fucked-up *IF* they happened to take notice of me in the first place :p
I also want to get my motivation back. Dave was only commenting a little while ago (we hit the pub tonight so apologies about jabbering on in this post and any spelling mistakes) that my motivation has decreased in the last four years we've lived together. By the same token he also feels that I'm alot more considerate of my partners needs and go out of my way to make them feel loved and happy. Now I've always gone out of my way to make my partners feel loved and happy but I know what he means about this. When Dave first moved in with me I was also living with Delphine and very heavily involved in running the Camarilla (for those who don't know the Camarilla is an international Live Roleplaying society). I spent so much time organising things that I did end up not giving as much time to Delphine as she should have got - and also not going out and doing as many things as I/we should have. This is something that I regret terribly, and to be honest did dislike at the time, but I *felt* I had commitments to the society and it's 10,000+ members as I was one of the International Directors of the society. I don't regret my time organising the Cam but I certainly do regret not being able to spend as much time with loved ones and good friends as I should have because of it.
I want the sort of motivation that I showed for the Camarilla back so I can invest it in Cubicle 7 and other projects.
Hopefully I'll generally feel a lot happier in 2005 than I did last year but ultimately that's for me to sort out.
I want cuddles too.
Especially cuddles :)